Self Talk

Totally RICH!!

Oh my goodness my friends! I have just received the most amazing email!
(And I do not use the word "amazing" lightly!)  
I am Totally RICH!!
Just look at the following!
I know you're all simply raging with jealousy and amazement.
Don't worry - we'll have a great party as soon as said funds are safely within
my grasp.
{When will that be, I wonder???}
But for now, let me share this elegantly written epistle with you.
Surely it is from the hand of a great legal mind.....
{I have edited it a bit.  My edits are in red, sometimes purple - I'm so giddy with 
excitement it's hard to tell!}
Read on, and do please tell me what you think!
From: Mr. Person who should get a real job
Head/ Claims Department,
London - United Kingdom

Re: This is for your attention.

I am Mr. B. H. Swindler manager claims department with a Bank here in London 
United Kingdom. 
I wish to notify you again that you were listed as a beneficiary to the total sum
 of Thirty-seven million two Hundred thousand United States Dollars in the codicil
 and last testament of the deceased. (Name now withheld since this is our 
second letter to you).

I am contacting you because you bear the surname identity and therefore
 I can present you as the beneficiary to the inheritance. I therefore reckoned 
that you can receive these funds as you are qualified by your name identity. 
All the legal papers that will be used to process the payment will be handled by me, 
in your acceptance to co-operate with me on this deal.

Kindly forward to me your letter of acceptance; and confirm your full name, 
current telephone and fax numbers and a forwarding address to enable me 
file in necessary documents at our high court probate division for the release 
of this sum of money to you. 

Please contact me via my private email:
yours faithfully,
Person with nothing better to do with my life

                                If only I could get Perry on the case...