Betrayed By Technology

Water Addict


Having gone from existence as a coke addict (as in “diet coke”) to a water addict over the course of the last three weeks I find myself with a few thoughts on the subject.

And knowing that every flipping person on the planet is no doubt breathlessly awaiting these thoughts of mine, here they are:

1-  Getting off diet coke was rough. I missed the carbonation, I missed the caffeine.  I missed the bite of that first sip and the pop/splurt sound the can made when I cracked it open.

I feel really really bad about this.  Especially when some people who live in my house and shall remain nameless (for now) will insist on buying the damn stuff and slurping drinking it around me.

{There is a reason alcoholics stay outta bars.]

2-   Water makes a person have to pee a lot.  And I mean a lot.  I now seem to spend about half my day in the bathroom.

This is surprisingly boring.

3-   Caffeine withdrawal is difficult.  I had headaches, I felt oddly buzzed (in a bad way), I felt something was missing from my life.

{And yeal it was.  Caffeine meant a lot to me.  And now it’s gone and I wish it weren’t.}

4-  To be honest I get a little bored just drinking water all the time.  Yes one can put various fruits into it – but do I really wanna go there and mess with all that?

Yeal I don’t think so.

And I suppose pouring a little bourbon in would defeat the entire purpose….

(Plus I like bourbon all on its own.  In a glass by itself; no water, no ice.

So there).

5-  I seem to have an irrational prejudice against vitamin waters; because they’re popular, and trendy.

I’ve always hated disliked popular and trendy and stringently avoid both whenever possible.

This is due to my contrary nature and I’m totally at peace with that.


 Yup being a water addict is a pain in the butt.  Deciding how much one actually requires a day is also a pain in the butt.  (There is contradictory information out there.  I hate dislike contrary information as much as I dislike popular and trendy).

Then there’s the fact that a friend of mine’s cousin actually died from water intoxication.

How disturbing is that?

But it’s entirely possible.

Thus I now have another weird ass fear to conquer in addition to my long held worries over spontaneous combustion.

Though there is some comfort in the thought that the two would probably cancel one another out.

Don’t cha think?


  Lisa 2

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